Thursday, November 11, 2010

Emo-ing season

Hello World, The Princess is in one of her emo mood again. I really don't know why. I must either be too slack today or i slept too much. I should be studying. I know i should because i am so much behind time for all my lectures and stuffs. And yet, *sigh* we can't control our emotions right? Things always turn out unexpectedly. This minute you can laugh like crazy, the next minute you can mourn over something. Don't know why, but i just feel like typing out this blog post in Chinese. I know i am not good in Chinese but forgive me, dearest folks. I will try my best to use my very advanced Chinese skill to type out this post =))
We attacked this poor whiteboard during one of our combined cell. See? Murdoch people are very talented too. Go all the way!!!While watching (Hotaru no Hikari) today, this phrase caught my attention --“请好好珍惜好不容易坠入爱河的自己!”Let me use chinese.........

我不知道我最近在想什么。我只知道我把自己搞得非常情緖低若。因为太得空,所以想太多? 最近特别想家, 也许是不想面对考试吧!我知道我这次的成绩肯定比上个学期还要差。我也不知道自己在干嘛!!我讨厌这样的自己, 一点都不像我!那个想要创造一个属于自己的“新世界”的我跑到哪去了???我只觉得梦想离我越来越谣远!我不要!!!!!我要实现我的梦想。你们都给我回来!!!

本来觉得对“他”只是纯纯的欣赏,因为我跟他本来就不熟,也称不上朋友。但,我没预料到,单纯的欣赏也会变成“喜欢”。虽然这并不是什么大坏事,但,这也代表着我“痛苦的开始”。因为害怕,因为不敢主动,因为怕被拒绝,所以把自己弄得很不开心。我很失败对吧?只敢单方面的寻找关于他的东东,一心想要更了解他。不过,真的很难!!我又不知道他在想什么。也不知道他到底有没有目标。通过文字是没办法深入了解的。人还是需要沟通才能了解对方的。我也曾想过要放弃。有人对我说,“你根本就不像我所认识的Viola。我所认识的你是不会那么轻易说放弃的,因为这两个字根本就不在你的字典里面”。 我真的不明白我何时变得那么胆小。也许是“他”害的。 因为“他”,我变得很不像我。因为想了解“他”,所以我每天都不知如何是好。我需要神的领导。神啊,请给我指导。请告诉我这条路该怎么走。我该继续走下去吗?所以我就说嘛,喜欢一个人很痛苦,尤其是你跟他不熟。 可能他根本就不知道你的存在也说不定。可能他已经有喜欢的人也说不定。不行啦!我不能每天都往坏的方面想。我以前的“自信心”都不见了!有个人告诉我 “幸福是要自己去争取的!你一定要拿出勇气来踏出第一步”。 我想这也是我唯一能做的。等到我哪天充满勇气时,我一定不会让机会白白流走。要好好把握机会!我不能再害怕下去了。

在每个人的生命中,要遇见自己喜欢的人是很难的。可能你所喜欢的只是表面上的他/她。要真心接受他/她的全部并不容易。也许你们会觉得不可思意,我怎么可能会喜欢上一个我完全不了解的人。不过,这就是事实!感情是可以透过很多方面来发展的。也会在不知觉的情况下慢慢延生。我必需把事情想得单纯一点。只是交个朋友吧了,不用害怕!要好好珍惜好不容易坠入爱河的自己。我要对那个“他”说,“如果你真的有了心意的对像,我会自动放弃并且祝福你。但,如果你没有,请不要阻止我。但,如果缘分不站在我们这一边的话,我要对你说,谢谢你让我再一次体会到单恋人的滋味。我曾经花了三年的时间才能完完全全的放下一个人。曾经的“他”和现的“你”的感觉很相似。两个人都是我在不熟的情况下,从单纯欣赏转变成纯纯的喜欢。谢谢你!” 虽然很谣远,但我还是愿意赌一赌。我相信总有一天,上帝会献给我一个美丽的安排 =)

我的“新世界”,我不会放弃追求它的。每一次看“One Piece” 的时候,Luffy和他的伙伴是我最大的动力。我很想拥有像他们那样帅气的格性。尤其是路飞那就算死也不会放弃的格性在不知不觉中,已成了我人生中最大的目标。我一定要创造属于我自己的“新世界”。我的人生已开始慢慢转变了。 你看见了吗? 我不满足,我想要更多。。。。努力向前冲吧。。。

Whoaa..finally i am done. Composing a post in chinese can take several hours. I must think twice when i have the urge to compose my post in chinese again. It can't be helped. My chinese is bad.........=(

4 comments:

Jessie Sham JC said...

hey gal, sometimes can emo la, but dont emo too much ar! hang out with us laaa, we are so gonna cheer u up =)

or maybe listen to that annoying song on youtube, maybe it helpsss XD

Viola Ng said...

Hey yo jessie,
haha..yup thanks a lot!That was a few days ago. Now no more emo. What's mine will be mine. What's not mine, i am so not gonna pursue it anymore. I wish to tell you more about it. Remember our girls talk with Maggie that time? Heheh..

That annoying song? Oh my god, it will makes me even more emo if i listen to it more..ahahahahahaaaaaaa....

sure sure. will hang out with you guys soon. Tell me if you guys are planning to go ECL. will study with you guys...

llx said...

yoooh i long time din come,first time leave comment here hehee.gambateh viola, go for it :) dun regret then okay dy yoh!

Viola Ng said...

Thanks Xuan.
i dont want to regret too =)) but there is nothing i could do except to let it be and see if i could know him more =))