A letter to the Mum

Hey peeps, there must be something wrong with me for i don't usually update 4 posts in a week. Anyway, it could have been a peaceful week if i didn't happened to get up late and decided not to attend class. What is the use of rushing and panting into the class and falling asleep there when you know you are not fully awake. So torturing. Oh well, all thanks to some considerate readers who read my blog and told her about it and she started questioning me, mentioning some sensitive issues which i DISLIKE to hear. For those you knows me, i don't care if you check out my facebook all the time or think that i am super slack in my studies and always going out, but please don't always talk to me in sarcasm tone. I can't stand it. Call me sensitve and call me crazy, but i am who i am.
I fought with my mum last night over this issue. Why? Because i hate nosey people who tend to assume things based on what they see. I am not that inconsiderate. I know i am far away. I know the only way to connect to me is through Facebook and phone calls and my blog. You can accuse me for all you want but as long as you don't try to think that it is my church mates who causes me to stumble. They had nothing to do with all these. If you know me well, you will know that i am a hot-tempered person. So don't think that i am getting from bad to worst for it has always been the same. It hadn't change at all. Don't test my patience please for i am trying hard to follow what God wants me to do. I ve committed so many sins last night because of this. First, i quarrel with my mum. Second, i loses my temper. Third, i thought of losing faith. I know i am at fault because i can't stand the slightest thing that irritates me. It really pissed me off when i realize that my mum don't trust me at all. Hello, She called me once a week or precisely, maybe two weeks once. And whenever she calls, i always happened to be outside, and she assumed that i always go out. She only found out i skipped class once and she can ask me to not make her lose confident in me and don't try to be a bad influence. Hello, i am your daughter. Whatever i am doing is all for myself and my family. Other people has nothing to do with it. Whether i achieve a good or bad result, nobody has anything to do with it. I am studying for the sake of myself. My own personal life shouldn't be anything to others. Why must you say things which is so hurtful and made me loses and confident? You have your own temper too. So why can't i have mine? Whenever you flared up, people around you can't do anything. But why don't you spare a thought for people? You are always assuming things based on what you see. When i didn't explain anything, it doesn't mean that i am feeling guilty or so. I just don't like to tell things which is unnecessary, which makes people worry. Can't you trust me even for a little? I need my own life too. Stop making me felt as if all the people are keeping an eye on what i am doing and always reporting to you. Call me sensitive and call me guilty but i don't care. You can say what you like as long as i know i am not doing anything to let you or myself down. I know i am being emotional last night. I am sorry about it but still i wanna say, stop mentioning things that will piss me off.

I doubt that she will read this but even if she does, be it! And whoever that knows my mum read this, feel free to tell her if you feel like it. Right now, i don't care who will report anything to her or always assuming things based on what they see. I must admit, i am super sensitive over all these. I guess this is God's challenge for me, asking me to be patient. Learn the fruits from God. I am living for God's sake.

Anyway, enough of all these. Let's talk about something that can cheer me up. While serving in Kids ministry today, i was bombarded by Daylan's random words. He is super cute. Wing said i showed favoritism to Daylan. I must admit it is true but i do love the other kids too. I am closer to a few of them. Daylan is just a kid whom i will pay extra attention to for he is forever not paying attention in Sunday School and he is always living in his own World. You can learn a lot from kids actually. I used to be super impatient with my cousin Barry and those naughty little kids, and yet i do love kids. But eversince i joined Kids Ministry, i realized i have already overcome this "Impatient" spirit of mine. Why? There are more kids out there who are even more naughtier than my cousin. The only different is just, our Zion Kids has more faith in God than my cousin. I can always learn new things from kids. They are just so pure and cute that i wish i could go back to being a kid once more. In conclusion, kids are just so cute. In front of them, you are just being yourself. There is no need to be shy or having political issues for we all love each other in Zion Kids. I am glad all the kid's parents realized the importance of building up faith in young child. Just like our vision " To invest in children to raise up a generation who loves god". Too bad i missed out that stage in my life. It is really important.

Alright, let's have a look at some of the things Cute Daylan said which bombarded me a lot.

1)When i was giving out refreshment to the kids 3 weeks ago, Daylan came and talked to me.
Daylan: I don't like cakes
Me : Why? Cakes are nice.
Daylan: Nope. I don't like them.
Me : Why?
Daylan: Because i am hungry.
Me : Speechless ................

He is cute isn't it? I know he is sort of allergy to everything. He can't have cakes, chocolate, and almost everything that has to do with nuts. Yes, he and his brother Christopher and sister, Erin were allergy to almost everything. So they got to bring their own food everytime. Poor thing.

2) While worshipping the Goodnight song today, we all got to sit down and pretend to sleep. And we got to raise up our hand while singing "I love you. Jesus I love you" .
Daylan : Talking about his spiderman costume while lying next to me
Me : Day day, you have to be quiet and follow what the others are doing.
Daylan : (Saw Leon and Michael raising up their hand) But i can't do it.
Me : Why not? Just raise up your hand. Surely you can do it.
Daylan : But i can't. It is too hard for me.
Me : It is okay then.
Daylan :I can't raise as high as them (Pointing to Leon and Michael) I can only raise like this.
Me : Speechless........................

3) During offering time, we got to close our hands and pray.
Me : Day day, i think you should close your hand like this. We are praying now.
Daylan : I can't do this either. It is too hard for me.
Me : Let me teach you then.
Daylan : No. I still can't do it.
Me : (Closing my eye to pray) Daylan tapped me a while later.
Daylan : Hey look, i can do it (closes his hands) It is easy for me =)))))
Me : Speechless..................

4)After arts and crafts, the kids were running around.
Daylan : Can you help me to put on this? ( His spiderman mask)
Me : Okay. Can you see me now??
Daylan : Yes ( With a big smile and runs off)

A few minutes later
Daylan : Can you help me to put on this again?
Me : Okay. But why do you put it on and take it off again?
Daylan : Excuse me, what is your name?
Me : Huh? Me?
Daylan : Yes. May i know what is your name?
Me : I am teacher Viola
Daylan : Okay. Teacher Viola. Can you be the monster and come and catch me?
Me : Speechless ................

Look at that. He is really really a cute boy. I will always go speechless by what he said. His words are so unexpected. He healed my bad day and makes me forget the harsh quarrel i had with my mum last night. Really, i tell you, seeing the kids running around and telling of their life happenings can really makes you laugh. I love kids....=)))

Sorry, it is a bit too long. Gotta leave this blog for a while. See you all in the next post.