Thank You BB..

Good Afternoon World, i thought i could write a post before i goes to church. Honestly, my week started off badly. Why? Now i ve learnt my lesson. Being too emotional can caused you to fall sick. I was feeling sick for the whole week. It was really torturing. Anyway, i received a letter (small parcel) from my beloved KELLY BB =) She is my SUPER AWESOME VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT PRINCESS. I couldn't helped thanking Jesus for that wonderful moment.
Thanks for the handmade diary BB. Look at Mu Mu. He is smiling at you. Can't wait for the reunion of Mu Mu, Mi Mi and Mo Mo.

Would you be there to love and to be with me? Would you swear that your love is always true? Would you say that you always be the one, to take my breath away? Would you be there? Okay, i am crazy over this song. I know my BB will always be there to listen to all my blabberings and stories =)

Someone told me "You are more girly now compared to last time " . I was like "Huh? Why? You called this girly??" (Pointing to the way i dressed and my posture) "Yala. You are always emo nemo. And that causes you to be girly! " said that person. Okay, i straight away went speechless. NO WAY.......i will never be girly. Stop being emo all the time Viola Ng!!!!!!!

I received a bouquet of roses from dearest Maggie on my big day =) So sweet of her. Initially, the roses were stunning and beautiful. But as time goes by, its beauty began to fade and it no longer looks beautiful. From afar, it looks like an old stack of roses where mould covers majority of it but as we come closer, the roses are actually quite beautiful. Check out the picture above. Maybe you could say i am crazy, but i do think the roses looks pretty =)

I had a talk with someone last night. Never had i realized that behind that young and tender heart of his is actually being covered with wounds and memories which cannot be erased. What i want to say now is, memories are like a bouquet of roses. Beautiful and yet heartbreaking. Roses are pretty but it is still covered with thorns. Since we can't rewind the time back to the past, so why not we bring the beautiful memories and move forward just like how life is suppose to be? Since we can't do anything, we should just set our target forward........walk towards future....=)

With that, i wanna refresh you with my most favourite phrase " DARE TO DREAM, DARE TO ACCEPT!" If i can, i really don't wanna let emotions gets the better of me. The best way to do so is to live beneath our dreams. I ve found something better to live for...=)))

The String's family is calling out to me

Hello World, i am back again. This time is not about me being emo nemo. I must said that ia m feeling quite happy these few days apart from the fact that i lost my voice due to a major sore throat. Serve me right for being greedy and cannot resist to food. I gobbled up the food like a hungry glutton and hence, i was sick. Anyway, i was asking a lot of people if fantasizing is a sin? I mean it is alright to imagine isn't it? Life would be so miserable if i have to quit fantasizing. I need some imagination to continue my story =PThe 5 of us has been eye-ing on these Ukuleles' in Fremantle Market for quite a while. And without thinking, we purchased it. Yes, all of different colour. Mine is white of course. Check out the picture above. Even though it wasn't of good quality but it is durable. Suitable for beginner's like me. People said, the string's family sounds emotional and the people who plays it can be really emotional at times. Maybe it is true for the more i play my Ukulele, the more i miss my Violin. I hope Mummy won't do anything to my lovely Violin back at home. Now, the first thing i will do the minute i reach home this coming december is to say "Hello Violin"to my beloved Violin and i'll make sure i bring her over when i come back next year =) I guess it is time for me to pick up Violin again. I don't want to waste the chance that i have and to regret later on. We must always treasure what we have before we lost it =)

Sometimes i fantasized too much and i tend to let imagination gets the better of me. I chose to believe the existence of Fairy tales and chose to turn a deaf ear to what is happening in reality. Sometimes i tend to judge something based on appearance and chose to fool myself that this is the one i am looking for. But in reality, i don't even know if it is the right one or that i am just being a fool myself. We only say things based on what we see but in exact, we can't see the inner part of it. Perhaps what you see or think is not what it is suppose to be? Will you still be stubborn enough to pursue something which is not meant for you? And you know that the percentage is super low? Well, i don't know.............

A letter to the Mum

Hey peeps, there must be something wrong with me for i don't usually update 4 posts in a week. Anyway, it could have been a peaceful week if i didn't happened to get up late and decided not to attend class. What is the use of rushing and panting into the class and falling asleep there when you know you are not fully awake. So torturing. Oh well, all thanks to some considerate readers who read my blog and told her about it and she started questioning me, mentioning some sensitive issues which i DISLIKE to hear. For those you knows me, i don't care if you check out my facebook all the time or think that i am super slack in my studies and always going out, but please don't always talk to me in sarcasm tone. I can't stand it. Call me sensitve and call me crazy, but i am who i am.
I fought with my mum last night over this issue. Why? Because i hate nosey people who tend to assume things based on what they see. I am not that inconsiderate. I know i am far away. I know the only way to connect to me is through Facebook and phone calls and my blog. You can accuse me for all you want but as long as you don't try to think that it is my church mates who causes me to stumble. They had nothing to do with all these. If you know me well, you will know that i am a hot-tempered person. So don't think that i am getting from bad to worst for it has always been the same. It hadn't change at all. Don't test my patience please for i am trying hard to follow what God wants me to do. I ve committed so many sins last night because of this. First, i quarrel with my mum. Second, i loses my temper. Third, i thought of losing faith. I know i am at fault because i can't stand the slightest thing that irritates me. It really pissed me off when i realize that my mum don't trust me at all. Hello, She called me once a week or precisely, maybe two weeks once. And whenever she calls, i always happened to be outside, and she assumed that i always go out. She only found out i skipped class once and she can ask me to not make her lose confident in me and don't try to be a bad influence. Hello, i am your daughter. Whatever i am doing is all for myself and my family. Other people has nothing to do with it. Whether i achieve a good or bad result, nobody has anything to do with it. I am studying for the sake of myself. My own personal life shouldn't be anything to others. Why must you say things which is so hurtful and made me loses and confident? You have your own temper too. So why can't i have mine? Whenever you flared up, people around you can't do anything. But why don't you spare a thought for people? You are always assuming things based on what you see. When i didn't explain anything, it doesn't mean that i am feeling guilty or so. I just don't like to tell things which is unnecessary, which makes people worry. Can't you trust me even for a little? I need my own life too. Stop making me felt as if all the people are keeping an eye on what i am doing and always reporting to you. Call me sensitive and call me guilty but i don't care. You can say what you like as long as i know i am not doing anything to let you or myself down. I know i am being emotional last night. I am sorry about it but still i wanna say, stop mentioning things that will piss me off.

I doubt that she will read this but even if she does, be it! And whoever that knows my mum read this, feel free to tell her if you feel like it. Right now, i don't care who will report anything to her or always assuming things based on what they see. I must admit, i am super sensitive over all these. I guess this is God's challenge for me, asking me to be patient. Learn the fruits from God. I am living for God's sake.

Anyway, enough of all these. Let's talk about something that can cheer me up. While serving in Kids ministry today, i was bombarded by Daylan's random words. He is super cute. Wing said i showed favoritism to Daylan. I must admit it is true but i do love the other kids too. I am closer to a few of them. Daylan is just a kid whom i will pay extra attention to for he is forever not paying attention in Sunday School and he is always living in his own World. You can learn a lot from kids actually. I used to be super impatient with my cousin Barry and those naughty little kids, and yet i do love kids. But eversince i joined Kids Ministry, i realized i have already overcome this "Impatient" spirit of mine. Why? There are more kids out there who are even more naughtier than my cousin. The only different is just, our Zion Kids has more faith in God than my cousin. I can always learn new things from kids. They are just so pure and cute that i wish i could go back to being a kid once more. In conclusion, kids are just so cute. In front of them, you are just being yourself. There is no need to be shy or having political issues for we all love each other in Zion Kids. I am glad all the kid's parents realized the importance of building up faith in young child. Just like our vision " To invest in children to raise up a generation who loves god". Too bad i missed out that stage in my life. It is really important.

Alright, let's have a look at some of the things Cute Daylan said which bombarded me a lot.

1)When i was giving out refreshment to the kids 3 weeks ago, Daylan came and talked to me.
Daylan: I don't like cakes
Me : Why? Cakes are nice.
Daylan: Nope. I don't like them.
Me : Why?
Daylan: Because i am hungry.
Me : Speechless ................

He is cute isn't it? I know he is sort of allergy to everything. He can't have cakes, chocolate, and almost everything that has to do with nuts. Yes, he and his brother Christopher and sister, Erin were allergy to almost everything. So they got to bring their own food everytime. Poor thing.

2) While worshipping the Goodnight song today, we all got to sit down and pretend to sleep. And we got to raise up our hand while singing "I love you. Jesus I love you" .
Daylan : Talking about his spiderman costume while lying next to me
Me : Day day, you have to be quiet and follow what the others are doing.
Daylan : (Saw Leon and Michael raising up their hand) But i can't do it.
Me : Why not? Just raise up your hand. Surely you can do it.
Daylan : But i can't. It is too hard for me.
Me : It is okay then.
Daylan :I can't raise as high as them (Pointing to Leon and Michael) I can only raise like this.
Me : Speechless........................

3) During offering time, we got to close our hands and pray.
Me : Day day, i think you should close your hand like this. We are praying now.
Daylan : I can't do this either. It is too hard for me.
Me : Let me teach you then.
Daylan : No. I still can't do it.
Me : (Closing my eye to pray) Daylan tapped me a while later.
Daylan : Hey look, i can do it (closes his hands) It is easy for me =)))))
Me : Speechless..................

4)After arts and crafts, the kids were running around.
Daylan : Can you help me to put on this? ( His spiderman mask)
Me : Okay. Can you see me now??
Daylan : Yes ( With a big smile and runs off)

A few minutes later
Daylan : Can you help me to put on this again?
Me : Okay. But why do you put it on and take it off again?
Daylan : Excuse me, what is your name?
Me : Huh? Me?
Daylan : Yes. May i know what is your name?
Me : I am teacher Viola
Daylan : Okay. Teacher Viola. Can you be the monster and come and catch me?
Me : Speechless ................

Look at that. He is really really a cute boy. I will always go speechless by what he said. His words are so unexpected. He healed my bad day and makes me forget the harsh quarrel i had with my mum last night. Really, i tell you, seeing the kids running around and telling of their life happenings can really makes you laugh. I love kids....=)))

Sorry, it is a bit too long. Gotta leave this blog for a while. See you all in the next post.

Potluck Potluck

Hello Hello, it is rare to see me updating my blog frequently (Like 3 posts in a week?) Hmm, you know why? I am feeling so guilty for skipping class this morning. Serve me right for not having enough sleep =( Anyway, just a quick post this time. I *heart* potluck because Potluck= FOOD. My awesome friends are always cooking so much for me =) Pictures can say million words. So i won't say much this time. Towards the end, we still have so much leftover food. I could have eaten most of them if i did not stepped onto the weighing scale and to the cruel reality which spoilt my appetite completely. I am serious this time. No more high calories food for me until i drop back to my normal weight.

"Sometimes i am happy. Sometimes i emo for no reason. Sometimes i flared up. Sometimes i just want all of them to disappear. Sometimes i can't stand them for who they are. Sometimes i let anger gets the better of me. Sometimes i just feel like fighting. Sometimes i just want to be anti-social. Sometimes i am mad at them for even the slightest misconcept. But towards the end, FRIENDS are still important to me and i thanked Lord for them. You see, only true friends will be honest with you for they really want you well =) "

Life is like a drama??

Aloha peeps, Viola is back again. Can't believe i am back so soon isn't it? Hmm, i don't know but i do have lots of random thoughts on my mind. Life has been slightly tough for me after being a newborn. You get what i meant? I know this is just the beginning of my spiritual life and yet i can feel that the route is getting tougher and tougher. There are a lot of Do's and Don'ts which is super hard for me to maintain. The more i tried, the tougher it is. Anyway, i am just crapping. I know the mighty one will help me to pull through. Thank you Jesus.

Alright, since i am here, let's talk about something else. My title says " Life is like a drama?" Do you agree with it? The word "ACTING" automatically pops out from my mind the minute i hear the word D.R.A.M.A. You see, obviously we got to ACT and of course you are acting as someone who is not you. Challenging right? Okay, to shorten the story, i am a girl who couldn't dance, and couldn't sing (well, at least i can when i don't have to clap hands). You see, i didn't even thought of wanting to act because to me, i carried the same thought as most people. Drama people are always acting and not being themselves. And i hate being someone who is not me. I hate to act. You get what i mean? It is like " I am who i am" so why not i just continue being myself rather than acting as somebody who is not me. Okay, i don't want to go that deep. In conclusion, i just wanna say, i changed my mindset when i came to Perth. I thought of joining choir and i thought of trying out dancing but, i ended up in drama ministry. All thanks to Alph who signed me up for Freshies Welcome.
The unruling Drama Team - Foolz for Christ. I wasn't feeling that comfortable during the first rehearsal with them for i still couldn't open myself up to them. Surprisingly, i grew to love this team more and more. And i realize life couldn't be anymore happier without these people around. You see, our life is full of drama. We are not afraid to laugh, not afraid to speak loudly, and most importantly, not afraid to show the REAL us. And frankly speaking, you are just being yourself in this team where we acted in our own characters. We characterized our own personality in every roles and thus, we are only being ourselves. I am glad God put me in this team and i can understand why Alph chose to put me there =) Life is like a drama. We are just carrying out our own characters well in real life. Drama rulezz.... Are you just being yourself? Alright, let's change topic. I have a lot of weird and random thoughts nowadays. Maybe because i am too obssessed with "Would you be there?" by Redwan Ali. All thanks to Shermaine, for i can always hear this song playing the minute i step into her room.

If two people who are of different world, do they stand a chance to be together? This thought came into my mind when i watch "Cinderella Story". It is just like a fairy tale which all the girls are yearning for. You see, imagine if the two of you were like strangers, barely talk at all, and knows nothing about each other. The feeling is just like when you walked past and missed each other on a busy road. Do you think fairy tales will still exist? Well, maybe it does. It all depend on who would sacrifice the first move. I can't figure out the other best solution to this question.

Okay, i think i am being weird. Maybe i should get on with my assignments instead of blogging here =))) Till then....

I found my way back home

Hello World, i am back. Finally i decided to blog after neglecting my blog for super long. Funny right? Remember i used to promise you, my friends, that i will update frequently even when i am in Perth. Yes i did, for the first few weeks. You know why? Because i thought i will be someone without friends and most importantly, after realizing how boring Perth is (And yet, i love Perth the minute i set my foot on it) But surprisingly, i don't find this place boring at all right after i started my uni life. I thanked Lord for all the things that happened in my life and the way he blessed me. When i think back, i used to complaint a lot aye, envied of people's life, always thinking my life is not perfect enough and i don't know much about World outside. I have thought of becoming bad. I meant not exactly bad but trying hard to fit in people's life. But it is just so hard. I am not daring enough to step into a club and neither do i have the courage to pick up smoking. Come on, i don't even have the courage to drive. My friends complaint that i can't drink and that i will go crazy and high after taking the first sip. And yet, all my friends were so sociable. I am always being emotional, thinking and hoping to end my life but never have the guts to even pick up a knife or to even cut myself with blades. Come to think of it, i guess this is the way God tries to signal to me that i should love my life and appreciate what i ve got. I accepted him in my life somewhere around year 2007 when HE solved the problem between me and Puan Mahani. Anyway, i am not a good student =)
My super super awesome cell. These are the people who are always there for me whenever i needed them and of course my dearest girlies. I couldn't mention all of them here for it takes like forever to recall what they ve done to impact my life. I thought being a Christian is just to believe in HIM and that's all i can do. Oh ya..and pray. So naive right? I didn't even know that God has been calling me all these while and i ignored his call. I didn't even know that there is so much to do and learn. God open his door for me when i came to Perth and that is when i found my faith back. I don't think i even deserve all these as i really did swayed away from him for more than 2 years. You see, i didn't even attend church. I only attended it for less than 10 times (including the time when i served in National Service) and yet i can't believe i have the cheek to tell people i am a Christian. Bible? I have one but what is the use of proclaiming a bible when i don't even understand any of the verses nor the teachings in it. And what is the use of having a bible when all i do is just to chuck it beside my bed and let it be covered with dust? God is patient with me. He forgives me despite all the sins i have commited throughout my life and during the time when i dare to call myself a Christian but without learning his words. He showed me that life is not easy without his words. I am glad God still sees the potential left in me and he decided to show me the way back home =)

Flowers and cards of encouragement from my awesome family =) Indeed, it is not easy to write or even to read out our own living testimony because there is so much to tell and yet so hard to compose it on a piece of paper. It is a major sin if you ve done something that causes people to stumble. I hope my testimony won't stumble anyone. I know i am old enough to make my own decision but still i want to respect my parent's decision. As i said, i don't need them to give me consent of what i wanted to do, but all i want is just their blessings towards the direction and route which i am heading to. I know my situation will take longer term but i believe, as long as i surrender myself to him, i know he will handle the rest. Just like how he calls out to me, got me saved and bring me back to where i belong. All the while i thought the whole family is against my decision but now, after having a talk with my uncle whom i respect the most, i realized he actually support my decision as long as i know what i am doing. He asked me to try to understand the true meaning behind my mum's over-reacted words. I guess i am like a patient that needs to be heal immediately. There are many sides of me that needs immediate healing. I am bad-tempered, impatient, gets jealous easily, was once a hypocrite, jumping to conclusion without even bother to hear the exact explaination, and etc. Hey, who can be all perfect without any flaws within them? It is hard to change but i believe as long as i have faith in him, i can. The minute he calls out to me, i know i am willing to leave behind my past and to follow him for the rest of my life. I am glad he show me the way back home and people, I FOUND MY WAY BACK HOME.

This is my testimony but it is from a more personal inner description =))))) Will update soon...

Finally....

Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooo World, this blog is not dead yet because the Princess is back to update her bloggie. Sorry for not keeping my promise to update frequently. I have too much to update and yet no time to update. Okay okay, i admit i am kinda lazy but i honestly don't have the mood to blog. Even now.....i still can't find the mood to update my post. *Sigh* Well, time flies, without realizing, my one week study is gone again. Arghh..how i hate studying!!! I meant to rest or at least do some studying during the week but i ended up having a most fulfilled week without resting nor even open my books to study. Many things happened recently. There were good and bad things though....!I am glad God is always there to help me to pull through. I am not going to blabber so much for my intro. Check out my heart diaries at the end of this post to find out more.

PS: Never become a student like me if you wanna score all Ds and HDs.

I am having a good time going here and there. I went to Perth Royal Show, met up with my babe Catherine, followed Shermaine to Margaret River, shopping and eating NON-STOP, Scarborough and etc. I am not going to define every single detail of it. Check out the pictures below to find out more.

It was Natalie's 20th birthday (26/9/2010). Saengil Chuka Hamnida. We decided to go to the Perth Royal Show. Somehow, i don't feel like going anywhere that day because my mood was completely spoilt when i realized i ve lost my concession card. If you were a student, you will know exactly how troublesome it can be without a concession card. Hmm, anyway, i ve promised my babe Catherine that i will go with her to Perth Royal Show and we did. I really wanted to ride on all exciting top gun, giant drop and all. But all thanks to the spinning spinning thingy, i started vomiting after the first ride. GAME OVER for me. I must say, that day is NOT my day after all. Everything does not went well for me. Still, the firework heals everything. It was awesome to the max =)

I ve promised Shermaine that i will go for a day's trip with her as her lovely Grandmother came here for a visit. It was a bit heartbreaking for me because it cost a bomb. Still, it was a good experience for i ve never been to those sight-seeing places after landing on Perth for nearly 8 months. Frankly speaking, i only went to Kings Park once since February till now. How pathetic is that? Anyway, we visited the Jetty, Lavender Farm, the Wineyard, the cave, and the Light House. I love the Lavender farm for i can get to see various type of lavender. They were beautiful and fragrance are everywhere. Even though the trip is not like what i predicted but still it was a good experience for me. The driver were rushing us from time to time. We were only given half an hour max to visit each sight-seeing places. It is not fun. I was so sick and tired of having to sit inside the bus for so long. Next excitement, meeting up with my babe Catherine again!!I was suppose to go Fremantle with my church mates but sorry guys, i ended up not going with you all. Dearest World, i ve tried my best to keep my hair long but i seriously can't stand it whenever i see the curly part of my hair. I told you, that was the biggest regret i had for perming my hair. I am so not gonna do it again. Finally, i chopped off my hair. Yayyy....that is why i chose not to go Freo with them because i really can't wait to chop off the end part of my hair. *Ngek ngek* Well, i stayed over at babe's place because she is all alone. It has been so long since we last had our *Girl's secret time* =)

I went yumcha with the guys at Dragon Palace the next day. And we decided to go the beach. We ended up going to Scarborough after aiming for Cottesloe since the starting of our discussion. It was fun. I thought of not going with them but i am glad i did. It was tiring but still, it is better than staying in the hostel with nothing to do. There you go....apart from all the shopping trips, eating sessions and expenses, i did have a most fulfilling week. Thank you Lord for all these great memories and experiences. And yet, God did punished me in the way which i deserve to be. I was playing and enjoying so hard that i forgot i had an online test this week. Luckily it worth only 1%, if not i am so gonna fail in this unit. I really have to pull myself together and to work hard for these final 7 weeks before i say "Hello" to Johor Bahru. Can't wait to go back and yet i know, i am enjoying every single seconds in Perth. Life here is not that bad IF ONLY you mix the right companions.

For my heart diaries session today, the title will be "Sorry". I believe, my close friends will know that i have found my way back to God again. I meant i accepted Christ years ago but the time when i truly truly committed myself to Him is just the starting of this year when i landed on Perth. I used to say, i believe everything happens for a reason. Just like how i believe God send me here for a reason. Of all places, why Perth? There must be a reason behind all these. And hence, i will not question God why he put me here and why all these take place. I never thought i will come back to him and neither did it occurs to me that i will commit myself to Him. This is the message which i finds it hard to convey to my Parent's for they will never never understand how things work. Anyway, i am sorry if all these doesn't make sense for my sleeping mode is on again. To cut the story short, I have the thought of getting baptized eversince i accepted Christ but due to the fact that i am the only believer in my family, i find it hard to receive God's command. I chose to ignore it. But now, i ve already made a decision. My mum was furious of course when i break the news to her. I understand her reason for not allowing me to but it is so hard to convince her and to tell her how i felt. I guess it is hard for her to believe that this is my own decision and no one force me into it. I guess my past has given her a mind set that i am the type of person who doesn't know how to say "NO" to people. I understand her but accepting Christ doesn't mean that i don't love her anymore. I am not saying that you must accept christ just like i do but all i want is just your blessing. Anyway, i just wanna say i am sorry for i have already made up my mind. I have learnt how to surrender everthing to God and he will handle the rest. I believe he will......=))

Okay...i hate blogging in the middle of the night because whatever i type doesn't make sense. Especially when it comes to the end part because it is completely different from what i wanna say. Well..........assignments are pouring. I hope i am able to pull it through the week......Wish me lucks. And yea...as usual, i will try to update frequently....=))))) Good night World...