The Princess is feeling guilty + sweet time with my babe

Hi Peeps, The Princess is back. I have been slacking for quite a few days. In my mind, i have tonnes of things to update but i don't know where can i find my motivation to do so. People, i am done with my Japanese Oral and Listening Test. How was it?I can only say, i screwed in the role play part plus i nearly doze off during listening test. So i didn't manage to catch the last part. =( Nevermind, i'll buck up for my final. Wish me lucks people.

The Princess is feeling guilty?Yes..she should!Because she broke her promise to others. She promised that she will be attending the combined cell last week but in the end, she did not. I was all ready to attend cell for the day but my babe came all the way from the city to visit me. 3 hours is definitely not enough for us for we hadn't been seeing each other for quite a while. But i didn't know that this would result in me, escaping from cell. I was so guilty that i didn't know what to do. What i can do is just cry cry cry?Stupid me. Why am i so weak?But i don't blame my babe Kai Lyn. Don't feel bad okay? I'll still love you =) Sorry babe and the rest for being so emo. I just felt like a failure for not doing my role well. Plus i hate the fact that i did not keep my promise. That's all.....but despite the fact of me feeling emo for the whole day. I did enjoyed my time with my babe Kai Lyn. I try to make myself drunk so that i can forget everything. But i am such a lousy drinker. I not only make myself sick and worst of all, i make my babe worried. Again World, she was my best best best friend eversince Primary One. And she is sooooooo pretty. Love her....=) Check out my babe below
She is very pretty isn't it? I am so proud to have such a beautiful babe. Thanks for coming all the way to Murdoch to visit me babe. Thanks for being so concern. Thanks for being such a good friend. Life is always happier whenever you and Tan Sri are around. I know you are worried about me but i know what i am doing. Don't worry babe. I'll take good care of myself.Good luck for your exams okay?? Hope to see you again soon. Thanks for everything ya....=)

I have so much to update but when i set my hand onto the keyboard, my mind went blank. I don't know what i should write. Nowadays, i realized, i am always doing something which i don't like. I don't want to be a hypocrite but i really can't bring myself to say "No" to others. Just like that day, i am already feeling so tired and sleepy after a major lacked of sleep for the whole week but in order to please people, i have to go out with them. What's wrong with me? I seem to have lost my power and strength to say "No". I chose to go with them and yet, i am making myself miserable by feeling so tired and emo. I just realized how tired i am recently. I am tired of having to please others. I am tired of having to do something i don't like. I am tired of having to face tonnes of problems and different expressions of someone every time. I am really tired....!I am a normal human too. Please give me a break!!Let me off.....!Why is it you guys can get angry and be emo whenever you want to but when it comes to my turn, you guys have so many things to comment about? I am just a normal human anyway...=( Can't i have my right to release my emotion at times?

The Queen scolded me yesterday for going out often. Hello..when did i go out? The furthest i go is just Utopia. And that is when we have transport. If not, how are we going to get there? When i asked her why? Then she say because i didn't answer her phone calls and didn't on "Skype". Do you mean i have to stay at home 24 to 7 just to wait for both yours and Aunt Aj's call? Your timing is always not right. Sometimes you called me at 5pm, sometimes, 11am, sometimes during night time. Do you expect i stay in my room for the whole 24 hours? Gosh...just because i didn't pick up your phone, then you accuse me for going out all the time. I know she is worried but then, don't accuse me okay. I am not the type of girl that will go out clubbing and to learn how to be a bad girl. I didn't even smoke or do something illegal. Have some faith in me please. I know you believe i am not that type of girl. Haix...a normal student need to have their own life too!!I did not tell you what i am doing just because i don't want you to worry about me. Imagine if i tell you i am walking alone in the dark yesterday all the way from Kardinya to Murdoch, how would you react? And what can you do?I am more than enough sore for not being able to go back to Malaysia this coming winter. Initially when i asked for your permission to go back, you asked me to stay back here. Then right now, after i have decided to stay here, you give me a really big surprise by asking me to go back. All my friends are trying really hard to psycho me to go back. The feeling is not even nice. I really wanted to go back but i can't. Do you know how hurt is it, when everyone else is back home, and i have to stay here? But I don't want to feel guilty again!Don't want ever...=( "Everything happens for a reason"........i'll stick to my decision!!

World, what will you do if you realize i have disappear from this World? Will you ever remember me? Anyway, i am just crapping!Nothing serious....=) How i wish i was a baby so that i can cry cry cry all day long without having to speak to anyone. Did i ever tell you guys i have lots of dreams??I have a new one now. And that is to change all the bad to good. Got it?Hmm..you don't have to know what i meant. I know this takes time, but i have my own dignity. "DARE TO DREAM, DARE TO ACCEPT". If one day, i failed in my mission, i'll still have to accept it. At least i have tried my best. True enough i will feel disappointed and upset over it, but this is the best i can do =)

Dearest BB, this is a strange way to reply your comment. Why must i reply like this? But anyway, since you are holding a most privilege position in my heart, i don't mind doing this just for you =) BB............SAVEEEEEEEEE ME PLSSSSSSSSSS!! Everyone is leaving me alone here....i miss you like hell. Why are we so far away? Most people don't understand me. And i have to say "Yes" to everything. I know you are gonna say i am a stupid girl but i don't know what's wrong with me. I am just so weak now!!Am i like that last time? Tell me more about my old-self. I seem to have forgotten who am i after i leave SETA. I am really tired BB. I am tired of having to stand his temper every time. I am tired of having to look at his black face everyday. T.T!! I am too tired to do anything BB. I just wanna hide myself away from the World. Why is it so hard to be myself?? Thanks BB, for everything!I know you are having your own troubles as well. Don't worry about having no one dating you. You think i have is it? And your birthday is still so far away, how you know you are spending it alone? Maybe Momo will accompany you? I have received your card anyway. Thanks BB. It has a strong "Malaysia" smell. But i can't hug it to sleep every night, because it'll get spoilt. I have to hug my Cute Bear and Mumu to sleep anyway =) Remember, your homework due date is coming near. Where is the FIRST picture taken by Mr Cammie? I am going to get my own Mrs Cammie. Hmmpph....Gambatte for your mission. I know you can achieve it soon!!=) Love you BB...have fun in JB. Tell me about your first experience taking a train back to JB. Enjoy the smell of JB...i'll talk to you soon. Muackz..yours truly, ME

Anyway World, i ve been blabbering too much. All meaningless stuffs. I will update a more meaningful post next time. =) I PROMISED i won't be emo in my next post...well..hopefully!!Good bye World...The Princess is feeling so sick and tired.....