Walking into the past

Looking back at the past memories make me realize I am really one blessed girl <3 nbsp="" p="">

Been missing and thinking of a lot of people recently. So, if you are and were on my mind, you are lucky :) I do love you all. Special thanks to Jojo (The girl in the picture above) who speaks life into me. She was the one who encouraged me to be an early childhood teacher and I love the way things work out for me.

Maybe I should start writing a series on "Walking into the past" to remind me of what God has done for me. You have been so good to me and I don't know what to say.. 

No work!!!

Hey World, I am just so glad that today is a Public Holiday that without noticing, I slept half the day away :( I have so many things to do and 24 hours a day is not sufficient at all. I just need to stop leaving things undone. This old habit of mine won't change. From young till now, I gets distracted easily. Especially now when I have lots of essays unmarked, lots of musics unpracticed, loads of notes not sorted out yet, lots of preparations undone and etc. Moreover, my Mom is not being understanding :( I know I can't blame her...it is the DEVIL that is working in her. I am not going to stop cursing those idols in my house!

 Angels making session for my beloved kids! I love it when they shouted eagerly "Teacher V, I want stickers!", "Teacher V, I want this!", "Teacher V, I want that!". They can never be patient and they want everything to be fast and quick. So cute of them.

I love the kids but I need more of God's patience and tolerance. It is getting easier each day :) I know I truly love them from the bottom of my heart. As much as I do want to correct them if they do something dangerous like climbing on the shelf and table, running around, acting violent and so much more, but I hope that these are the right reasons for me to scold them. I don't want to scold because I FEEL like it is the right thing. God will show me His ways. In You, I trust :)

My babies

I don't know I can be a teacher until someone speaks life into me. I remember it took place in Perth, a few days before I came back to Malaysia. All the Murdoch kids ministry people were gathering in Ivy's house for dinner. Alph was asking me if I would like to come back and do Masters. I was fooling around and say, "Yea.. perhaps I could come back to work as an early childhood teacher!" Jojo was listening and she said "Why not? I can totally imagine you as one :) " Her words keep on ringing in my head and I wonder if I could really become one? Isn't it awesome when someone speaks life into you? I would try to speak lives into others now :) 

My babies :) I love them...

Different people have different ways to reach out to. Teens have teens' way, kids have kids' way. It is not about you trying to squeeze yourself into their lives' by using your own methods. It is a choice of whether you want to humble down yourself and to fit in to their lives'. Be an understanding person...

Something that belongs to just me alone..

Looking at the kids remind me of those good old times I served in kids ministry in Perth.

 I miss this little cute boy Daylan. I wish I had more kids like him but the truth is... nobody can replace him. I wouldn't want to deal with 20 Daylan's.

I choose this picture because he was holding the black and white bangles I wear on my wrist. I still feel the connection. Even though I doubt that he would still remember me but I will always remember I have a young little student who is both cute and naughty at the same time.

Teacher Viola misses you :( I hope you will grow up to be a fine young boy and a boy whose heart would be dedicated fully to God. Teacher Viola will focus on investing in the children to raise up a generation who loves God.

A little sense of touchiness

I was having fun with my fellow partners at BierHaus just now while chatting with my precious bunch of students :) I do love them. They were so nice to include me in even though my status is a "Teacher" to them :) I made the right choice to stay back to invest in the lives of these young people. As much as I dislike what my ex-boss has done and what she is still doing right now, but I am glad I did not let that feeling of dislike to stop me from getting near to this bunch of youngsters.

I have many thoughts going on in my head when I received a notification from Facebook saying Keith has commented on my status. I thought it was Keith from Perth and I wonder why he would say all that to me. When I looked closer, it is actually my Uncle Keith from Singapore. I felt quite touched reading his comment. He reminded me of what I've been through these few years and I was quite touchy about it. Indeed Lord, You let me experienced too much in such a short time. I barely have time to breath. At my age, I shouldn't even be looking and vexing over all these. I have to sacrifice a lot of things which I held so dearly in my arms. Why Father Why?? Remember the time when I bitterly made my decision to come back to my homeland. Uncle Keith was the only one who understand my feelings and pain. He literally told me over the phone that he was proud of me making this choice and encouraged me to move on from where I am. To me, He is God-sent from heaven above. As quiet as he is, my Uncle doesn't talk much to me. He would rather I open up myself to him which I sometimes did but most of the time kept it to myself. He knew it all. He knew the pain and frustrations I was going through throughout the time I stayed at his place together with his family. He knew I was going through a big mass of problems and yet he leave me to settle it myself for he knows I am able to handle it. He would observed me from aside, waiting and waiting for me to surrender my white flag so that he could help me. He never objects to any decisions I have made but fully supported me in whatever and wherever I am heading to.

God, You made me strong. You bring me out of my comfort zone too soon. I am still longing to go back to the place where I know there is someone who would hug me, pat me, comfort me, pray for me, and encourage me whenever I am down. I am still longing for that comfort, knowing that someone would wipes away my tears whenever it rolls down from my cheeks. Thank you for turning me into who I am today. God, I am ready for the next phase. I'll never be afraid to cry again.

Gratitude

I've been traumatized, scared, worried, depressed by my "to-be-out-results". I know my own limits. I know my standards. I am the one answering the paper and I knew how it was like. There is someone whom I know could make a difference. Do I really want to surrender myself to Him? Can I trust Him to turn the situation around?

Father Lord, I only have myself to blame for not putting study as my priority. I am a student and my responsibility is to study and score well. Yet, I let my attention focus solely on working and  my students alone!! Serve me right!

After persevering in prayers for one month, I know You did do something to it. I am already very grateful to you! Devils can make me scare and being all negative...but You are the only solution to all these problem. I love You for this Lord...

My new job :)

After losing contact for so long, Catherine surprised me one day by asking me to visit her at her current work place (Kinderland). I was in the midst of deciding whether to stay or not to stay at E.I Learning Centre. Judging on the paid and workload, I decided to leave.

 I am happy with my current job now even though it is hard, hectic and exhausting. It is just the time that is long. I never handle young kids before except for that one year of experience serving in Zion Kids Ministry (It is so far still the best ministry)

God, You must be kidding me. I find myself having to do things which I have never done before. There are kids who will cling on to you like nobody else' business. There are kids who just can't click with you. And there are kids who are both naughty and shy.

Being a form teacher is not easy and yet, taking care of children is even more challenging. Especially when this is their first time having to be in school and day care centre and they usually made a scene. Crying is the best strategy for them to get out of anything. I felt like a Mommy having to coax my daughters to sleep and feeding them milk using milk bottle.

The best thing is when I can snap a picture of them sound asleep just because I was there to coax them. The best feeling is when they don't want anybody else but you alone. It's tiring but worth it. Why? That's because I prayed and committed the day to the Lord before I enters my work place every morning.

It is gonna be more challenging but I am not afraid. Bring it on!!!

My Church

You know Lord, You brought so much joy to me :) You have been blessing me since Christmas until now and everything else is good. 

What the Lord has done for me :-
1) You brought my parents to church and gave me a great christmas
2) You blessed me with a real job
3) You set fears in my life and now I am worry
4) You have given me new visions and provisions for the church
5) You have blessed me with more than I ever deserves

And now, I am gonna stick with You for as long as I live. I'll accept whatever challenges you have for me. Bring it on God..

2013

Today is the first time we had connect group in 2013 :) Things started off fine. It washed away my sorrows and pains. I love my connect group :) 

Just when I thought things were getting fine, but things blew itself in again. Nonetheless, I am just gonna give in and let You take charge Lord. If You want to expose things, let it be done!! I am all ready to expose whatever that I know. I have nothing to lay back because I am NOT AFRAID!!